What to say....

It's been a while since I have written, so I thought I would put down a few thoughts however inane they may be. Earlier this week, I made a post on facebook declaring that I was going to attempt to curb my cussing habit...as I sit, watching "Nerd TV" the "History Channel" this time, I am brought to the realization that my little "habit" isn't really that bad. The show that is on at this moment is on American Nazi's, and I am in awe of the ignorance and hatred that still permeates our society. People continue to raise their children to hate black people, Jewish people, etc...We all have our prejudices. I'm not so ignorant as to think that we do not. I just thought I would list mine here so EVERYONE knows where they stand with me. If you fit into one of my categories, feel free to leave me a comment. Afterall, like the Neo-Nazi's it is your constitutional right.
My prejudices...not necessarily in order of importance.
1. Stupid people
2. People that do not take personal responsibility
3. Fibromyalgia(Just a term some doctor made up to fit those of you that continually whine and complain about aches and pains that ALL of us have and most of us get up off of our asses and work through anyway)
4. People that "Suffer from Fibromyalgia" While seemingly related to #3, people with Fibromyalgia do not SUFFER. People with cancer, MS, and rheumatoid arthritis SUFFER.
5. People that think that Medicaid is INSURANCE...Guess what people??? You PAY for insurance. Medicaid is FREE. Paid by me and other people that actually have to work for a living to provide for our families.

While this isn't a comprehensive list, you get the main idea. There is no actual hate of an individual involved....just an intense dislike. Take it or leave it.

Where ever you go...there you are...

...*sighs...What a day! It is absolutely gorgeous outside, and the children are out of school. My phone signals that I have a text message, and it is from my sister. "Are you at work?"..."Yes"...I lie. Am I going to hell for not wanting to talk to her? Maybe. Then again, maybe not. I find talking to my sister a chore. A chore that I receive absolutely NO compensation for. I know that sounds mean, but she is life-source sucking person. Her life is always in an uproar and someone else is always to blame. This week, she is wanting to leave her husband of 25 yrs. Why now? I ask her. He has always been nothing but shit. "I just can't take it anymore." she says. Well, I sucked it up and decided to say what I have wanted and needed to say for over 20 years. I told her that it was high time she figured things out for herself. I told her to leave our Dad out of it, because he absolutely doesn't need the extra stress, and I told her to quit blaming other people for her problems. She texts me back a terse "OK." Guess I'm back on the shit list....Oh well, maybe it will buy me a few months of peace til the next crisis.....then again.....maybe not. Some people NEVER learn.

Peanut Butter Oatmeal Fudge...

I cannot take credit for this exact recipe, because I got the original from a friend a work who's name is Gerrie Hall. She made this great fudge and brought it in at Christmas time. It reminded me of the candy that my mom made when I was a child, so I asked her if I could have her recipe and she gave it to me. I have tweaked it here and there, but here is the recipe which in itself is to die for.

2 cups of sugar

4 Tablespoons of cocoa powder

1/2 cup milk (I use whole milk, but I guess you could use skim or 2%)

1 stick of melted butter

1/2 cup of peanut butter

1 cup of nuts (I use pecans)

1 1/2 cups of old fashioned oatmeal

Combine sugar and cocoa. Add milk and melted butter and cook on high til mixture comes to a boil. Boil on medium heat for 2-3 minutes. Remove from heat. Stir in Peanut Butter, Nuts, and Oats. Drop by rounded Teaspoons onto wax paper and let harden. Store in airtight container and enjoy til your heart is content!

PARTII: Anger Management??? Maybe...

Sooo, in my last installment I spoke about my trip to the psychiatrist....that post brings me directly to this one which centers around today....I have been fighting a crazy cold for a couple of days now and last night was horrible. I took my regular night time medications including my Ambien, but was awakened at around midnight with a stupid coughing fit. So I was faced with a conundrum. Do I take the Nyquil that is calling me from the medicine cabinet or do I try and fight it off. Well, the Nyquil won the battle, so I actually filled the dose cup (I usually just take a swig from the bottle), took the recommended dosage, and went back to sleep. I didn't wake up in time this morning to catch the person that snuck in and stuffed my head with cotton and sprayed acid into my eyes. Who knew? Anyhoo, I make my way into the kitchen I am startled by an unGODLY wailing. I realize then that either I am out of cat food or I have unwittingly stumbled into a ghetto funeral. Fearing the latter I quickly rub my eyes under my glasses and moan in despair. I am indeed out of cat food. I have Zac get ready, and I get myself ready...if wetting my hair and slicking it down with hair gel counts as getting ready. I throw on jeans and a t-shirt and head out the door to the Tractor Supply. It is the ONLY store in town that carries the brand of cat food that I use.

-Fast Forward to the Tractor Supply Cat Food Aisle-

One bag left...boy do I feel lucky...I pick it up to put it in the buggy and notice there is enough dust on it to actually germinate seeds, so I look for an expiration date. I find it, and it says, "Use BEFORE 11/20/08. WELL, ALRIGHTY THEN! This is just a tad expired....What follows is the actual transcript between the store "expert" and me.....
Me: Excuse me sir??? Sir???
Store Expert: yes?
Me: Do you have any more Blue Buffalo Cat Food? The bag on the shelf is expired.
Store Expert: You are WRONG about that. That shipment JUST came in.
Me: So, I'm STUPID AND ILLITERATE?? Go have a look for yourself.
**store expert walks and picks up the cat food bag coughs at the dust**
Store Expert: They must have sent us expired stock. You will just have to wait 2 weeks until the next shipment.
Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Like I'm gonna come back here.

So, off I go....30 miles to Newnan to Petsmart. Blue Buffalo Cat Food and 3 cat toys later I'm back home....fill the cat bowls....they eat and don't care what I've been through....figures....

PART I: Anger Management???? ME???? Maybe...

This post is inspired by true events. The names have been changed to protect the innocent.

First of all, I must give a little background information. If you are already privy to this bit of information feel free to skip to the juicy parts. I have been on some sort of anti-depressant/mood stabilizer since the ripe old age of seventeen. Keep in mind, I was given these medications NOT by a psychiatrist, but by my medical doctor. So here I go in to my medical doctor once again with my LOVELY insomnia complaint, and he says, "Geri, have you ever seen a Psychiatrist?" Bwahahahaha, MOI? NEVAH! Why in the world would I NEED to see a psychiatrist? I'm not crazy...well, maybe a little neurotic, obsessive, compulsive, and eccentric(eccentric because I am ABOVE the poverty line), but certainly NOT crazy. So, he says, "I think for us to get you back on the right medication, you need to see one." Well, after not sleeping for what seems to be years, I would have agreed to see Atila the Hun. I just want to feel semi-normal again right? So off I go to the psychiatrist...

(Fades in to the psychiatrists office 3 days later)
Geri: Hi, I'm Geri Addison and I have an Appointment at 2:30 to see Dr. Freud. (it is currently 1:45)
Nurse Ratchet: Your appointment isn't until 2:45. (stares blankly)
Geri: OK, do I have some forms to fill out or something?
Nurse Ratchet: They didn't mail them to you?
Geri: If they had, I wouldn't be asking for them. (Insert patented eyeroll in here)
Nurse Ratchet: They should have mailed them. (Blank Stare)
Geri: They just made the appointment on Monday. Today is Thursday. I write pretty fast I can fill them out now.
Nurse Ratchet: (insert heavy sigh here) OK, fill THIS one out first so the doctor will know what you are here for.

Soooo, I use the education that I paid for and filled out a "War and Peace" sized stack of papers in the HOUR that I had to wait to see the psychiatrist. I wouldn't think it would be a good idea to keep crazy....errr.....ECCENTRIC people waiting too long, but anyway I finally got in to see Dr. Freud and I was surprised that there was NO sofa for me to lie down on. How can I bear my soul sitting in a CHAIR? Oh the humanity! So the first question she asks me is why I was there. So I told her it was, because I wasn't sleeping and my medical doc wanted me to see someone.
Dr. Freud: Why Don't you sleep?
Me: I can't turn my mind off.
Dr. Freud: What do you think about?
Me: What DON'T I think about?
Dr. Freud: Do you have any obsessive or compulsive behaviors?
Me: Like What?
Dr. Freud: Do you shop to excess?
Me: Heck NO! I HATE to shop. Crowds make me anxious. I don't go to airports for the same reason.
Me: Wait...does online shopping count?????.......
Dr. Freud: Do you do it to make yourself feel better?
Me: Sometimes.
Dr. Freud: Do you spend money you don't have?
Me: not intentionally
Dr. Freud: Most people don't do it intentionally.
Me: you asked about me.
Dr. Freud:(smiles) yes I did.

SOOOOOO....

The visit went pretty well. She asked more questions and wrote down some of my answers. I did wonder if she made little comments in the margins like, "Damn this girl is a real nut case" or if she drew dirty pictures or something. I may ask to look next time. She will probably say no, but she just might say yes. She gave me a prescription for Topamax 25mg once a day. It is a seizure med that is also used for migraine headaches that is ALSO being used as a mood stabilizer. I'm on the smallest dose, and it will be tapered up as needed. She also put me on Ambien which is a med for sleep. YAY for sleep!!! I've been on them both for a week and 2 days, and only one side effect so far that I have noticed. Normally one side effect would be a GREAT thing, but this one is not so great for me LOL. The Topamax has altered the taste of my Diet Coke, so now it is like drinking a nice cool combination of carbonated dish water with a healthy dose of dirty socks mixed in. Looks like I'll be increasing my water consumption....Why couldn't it alter the taste of chocolate or cake or bread???? DIET COKE???? You have got to be kidding me!!!! At least I am sleeping...

It's been a while...

It has been a while since I have written, but it has been pretty much status quo around here. I've been working and trying to keep my household together which is no easy feat! There are definitely not enough hours in a day, days in a week, or weeks in a year. I have also discovered that the older I get, the faster time flies, and my children are growing up before my eyes! The past few weeks have been an emotional roller coaster for me. I got horrible news about my best friend in the world, and then the news got a bit better yesterday. There is still a battle to fight, but the war isn't nearly as one sided as we had thought in the beginning. I just hate being so far away from her. This week has been particularly bad, because one of my favorite people in the world decided to try and take her life, and she almost succeeded. Thank the Lord that she didn't. So, that is about all for now. Just keeping on keeping on...